“Coffee,” I tell the flight attendant.It’s… not great. But I relish that bitter black brew. Because it wasn’t long ago enjoying a hot cup of coffee in the air wasn’t a possibility.

Anyone who’s traveled with little kids knows that your hands are never free. Never.“I dropped my Hot Wheels, Papa.” “Where’s my water, Papa?” “I can’t do my seatbelt.” “Hold my snack, Papa.”

There is no rest. From packing to check-in to security to waiting at the gate to boarding, flying with the family is one ordeal after another.

The youngest of my four kids is eight now, and while I wouldn’t say traveling as a family is easy, our offspring don’t require nearly as much of my wife and I on the plane as they used to. Kindles, sketch pads, headphones, gum… they’re good to go.

Because I am no longer constantly digging through my carry on for snacks and toys and wipes, my SCALDING HOT DRINK rests on my deployed TRAY TABLE, alongside my very own BOOK.

Funny how coach can feel like first class.To those of you traveling with small children, hear this: It gets easier.

And accept, from my years of experience, my very best tips for flying with small children:

• No matter the age, my children would not play with, engage with, or be entertained by anything from their regular life in the airport or on the plane. Toys that captivated them at home, the books they wanted to read over and over… while traveling, they were invariably uninterested. Our solution? We started packing way fewer toys and activities, knowing the kids wouldn’t use them anyway. And what we did pack came from the dollar store in the form of cheap novelties. Nothing that would bounce or roll away. Nothing messy. Nothing with lots of little pieces that would get lost. Some of our favorites: Anything magnetic, plastic figurines, reusable sticker pads.
• Snacks. Snacks, snacks, snacks. When kids aren’t interested in their toys and games, they’re bored. And when they’re bored, they want to eat. Don’t fight it—embrace it. The space we saved in not packing toys we filled up with snacks. Not smelly snacks. Not messy, crumbly snacks. Fairly healthy snacks. Bonus points if the snack doubles as an activity (ie making necklaces out of ring-cereals). Some of our favorites: Fish crackers, fruit leather, yogurt raisins, cheese cubes, pop corn, and special treats like gummy bears and suckers. Fruit snacks and gummy candies can help keep ears from popping for kids who are too young to chew gum.
• And of course, when traveling, screens are your friend. We limit screens in daily life, but we’re talking survival, here. A well-timed movie is as much an emergency apparatus as the oxygen masks overhead.
• Practice. This may sound ridiculous, but imagine yourself juggling four car seats, one stroller, backpacks, suitcases, babies, toddlers, boarding passes, passports, etc. etc. etc. Figure out who’s holding what when. Figure out if it’s even possible.
• Speaking of possible, bring your kids’ car seats onto the plane if you can, at least until they’re four or five. They’ll settle easier within those familiar confines.
• If you don’t have a newborn to settle, don’t board early. It’s hard to turn down the opportunity when the gate agent offers, but seriously: Minimize the seconds you spend in the metal tube as much as humanly possible. This does not apply if you don’t have assigned seats, unless you want your two-year-old to spend the flight eight rows behind you. Hmmm…
• Advocate for your child’s needs, for the good of everyone on board. When we were in the sippy cup stage, the first thing we’d do after boarding was ask the flight attendant for a bottle of water or an apple juice so we could get our kids set up. Standing on the jetway is thirsty work. Think your fussy kid will be calmed by an extra packet or pretzels? Your bored kid might enjoy stacking empty cups? Don’t be afraid to ask.
• Don’t ever apologize for traveling with children. Despite the dirty looks and muttered comments. You and your family deserve to be on that plane as much as anyone. But you can apologize for their misbehavior. You can apologize for your crying baby. No reasonable person will blame you for those things, especially when it’s obvious you’re doing your best. But a gracious apology can be a nice gesture of solidarity that shows you’re not indifferent to the passengers around you.
• Remember: The flight will end. Truly, it will. When you’re in the galley frantically bouncing a screaming baby. When you’ve used up the last diaper or your child just threw up all over your last clean shirt and your kid has to pee for the 16th time. You’ll get there.
• Thank your flight attendants. Thank your pilots. Return the sympathetic smiles. Be gracious to your spouse. Be compassionate towards your children. Be patient with yourself. And enjoy your travels. 

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